Like a grains of sand, time slips by me quickly.
Feeling emptiness in all things that I partake in.
My friend is leaving soon and probably won't meet her till half a decade later.
I'm not sure what to do, should I go say good bye later on today or should I just stay home and intoxicate myself with alcohol till I achieved numbness?
I promised myself that I would never walk that path which caused me my form 4 year end results and my future as well; ASEAN scholarship but I cannot fight it.
Life is too taxing this way, which resulted in alcohol intake to drown the misery away and feigning a jolly look to avoid people from noticing the sorrow in me.
I hate smiling often or for no reason but some how it is ethical to society.
Let me ask then what's there to smile if everyday is the same shade of Grey to me?
I feel cold, not literally but metaphorically, having a family whom you keep secrets from is supposed to be normal for teenagers. But, I'm not just keeping a secret or secrets but a alternate life they never knew.
It's pain you know.
Other people have/had their family to support them while my own family; not just don't support, but are against it.
I kept my fair share of problems from people but that doesn't mean I'm trouble free.
Mentioning Church to my mum is like 5 times worse than,"Mum, I Wrecked your car."
this phrase.
Darn it.
I feel numb.
Pointlessly wandering KL but never feeling satisfied.
Signing off.
I see that same cloud raining over me.
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