Emptiness

16 more days till Judgment day.
37 more days till All Hell Break Lose as millions of 17 year old youths thrash the street with their raging hormones.

I, one of them chose to do the same by doing something rebellious to the school.
I'm going to dye my hair brown.
And the next day, I will go back to school to say Hi to all my teachers.
Eager to see the look on their faces.

Expected expressions from my teachers
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But that's not the point.
The main reason is, I felt a pain in my heart.
Not illness or diseases.
The pain is metaphorically real.

Did you not notice?
Whenever you walk around, can't you feel someone gazing from a distance corner.
So intense yet gentle.

It must had been superbly coincidental for us to bump into each other like 10 times in 2 hours?
I admit I went round just wanting to catch a glimpse of you.
When I see you, I forget everything else.

I've always played defense all this years of my life.
Playing defense, is a way of living.
Some play offense, some play defense.

Well defense is keeping a low profile.
From young, I kept hiding, watching from a crack on the wall hoping to remain invisible from your sight.

Well, kudos dear self, you succeeded in becoming nothing.
Your presence is not taken into account by many, including that person.

If dare not play offensively because i don't want to startle you.
I respect you and adore you.

But, it is of no use.
If only I know what you were thinking.
A saying goes, a penny for your thoughts?

My version,
The world if it pleases you, for your thoughts?

With this I say,
I will always cherish you from the bottom of my heart.
My dear, sweet, kind, lovely,loyal and undeniably caring companion.
My dear, C@r S3e Y0u.

Hope to take you out soon.

I'm too tired to express my demise of you bothering me 24/7.

SPM examination is not the ticket to everything in life, sure it can improve your career and etc. But try placing yourself into my shoes and you can feel how bad it hurts.

I have already tried avoiding by all means, I don't mind being ignored nor isolated.
I don't want that hope placed upon me.

Studying alone can't help you in the examination. Can't you see it through my eyes?
The pain, the annoyed and irritated soul?

Cause your actions and speech had made me believe that if i studied 24 hours a day you will claim that my 24 hours is equivalent to 24 minutes -_-

Lets go through a flash back.
I placed my pen down after 1-2 hours of add maths or Bio.
Then, you burst in and said you played computer for 1-2 hours now go study something ?
What else do you wan from me?
I tell you honestly I don't want to be a doctor because I gave up on Bio, you scolded me for telling the truth?

You wanted to play cold shoulder with me but you lose first and broke the silence first.

I hope it won't come to a situation where I would run away from home.

Just leave me alone, M.
I feel like moving out after SPM examination.

Just stop bugging me over SPM examination.
I already a teenager, who've wasted 17 years of his life doing everything you told me to.
I just want to live my life my way.

...

Isolation In A Dark Chamber; Ease My Pain.

"Put your back into it; stop whining.Your just plain lazy!"shouted M to me.

Feeling overly exhausted, I dropped everything and was left flabbergasted.

"What, you got a lousy C6 for three papers, Add Maths, Bio and History?" shouted M at me once more.

"But I gave everything that I had into the examination and managed to score at least 8As out of 11 subjects. Doesn't that matter to you?"I defended.

Why must you look at the negative side and criticize me from that particular angle?

If you, do not trust me then why do you even bother asking me then when you decided to investigate the truth since my words are mere crap to you?

I lied because I didn't want to spoil your mood for the day. It would be hard for you to actually get mad on that day.

I admit, lying is wrong but have you have paused to consider the stress that you placed on me?

"Go study Bio!" M told me just as I reached home after an exhausting day on Sunday.

I reached home about 08.00 and the first thing wasn't a 'HI' nor 'How Was Your Day?'
but it was 'Go Study Bio'.

Kudos! If I wasn't supposed to die young then you contributed to it then.
Look at my hair. Tell me, can't you see the number of white hairs on my head?

I wanted to study in my room but somehow you don't trust me to do so.

Enough is said and heard, if I were to hate studying, I know who to blame.

Now, it's about the day.
5th October,2009.

I was tired on the 4th, so I slept at 09.00pm
When i woke up at 02.00am, I realised that I received an sms, greeting me for the day.

It was a friend whom I have not contacted in months.
Then friends who I'm not close to even did the same.

But my closes and dearest person in my life could not just wished me within the 24 hours and he is D.

I gave D 24 hours to do so but nevertheless he failed.
So did E, E failed to do so although she remembered at first but forgotten.

Thanks I guess?
I would trade anything that I have just to hear both of them say those two words to me.

Well, now there's no way they can make it matter anymore.
Next year perhaps, if I'm still alive.
Who knows.

I hate this damned Life.
Boredom, Loneliness and Pressure

Though there is these friends of mine who never let me down and followed me where ever I go at any time.They are Misery and Sorrow.
Emo much?

I don't care.
Life is dissapointing enough
Signing off.

Chocolate !!!

Chocolate contains alkaloids such as theobromine and phenethylamine, which have physiological effects on the body. It has been linked to serotonin levels in the brain. Scientists claim that chocolate, eaten in moderation, can lower blood pressure.

Besides that,researchers have found that chocolate can make some people who are prone to depression less anxious and less irritable. Furthermore, a study of 3,000 people by the Black Dog Institute found 45 per cent of people with depression craved chocolate.

"Of those 45 per cent, 60 per cent found that the chocolate improved their mood when they were depressed," Joanne Crawford, study co-author said.

Researchers found that among the depressed, those who were anxious or worriers were more likely to benefit from the sweet treats.

They believe it is the endorphins and opoids in chocolate which make people feel more relaxed.

"The opoids are morphine-like and lower pain and that also flows through into mental wellbeing," Professor Gordon Parker from the Black Dog Institute said.

Swimming star John Konrads battled depression, often turning to chocolate when he felt low.

"I thought it was a pick-me-up, almost like a cup of coffee, but to hear that it's a soother makes sense to me with hindsight," he said.

While it is too early for doctors to start prescribing chocolate for depression, this study does prove that it has tangible benefits in fighting mood disorders.

"I think this will be reassuring to many people who will say this just merely confirms what I have found out over the years," Professor Parker said.

The only caveat is that even as an anti-depressant, when it comes to chocolate, moderation is the key.

Therefore, chocolate should only be taken in moderation but if your family bans chocolate for no apparent reason, direct them here to defend chocolate for the happiness it can and will bring to all of humanity.

Signing off,
Lol.

Everthing Atleast Once

Su Goi!!!!

Kawaai desu!!!!

These were the things that came up to my mind went this guy came up to our table and sat with us;he told us this. Watashiwa Soh Fook.

Ngo Dui lam jor tiu yao
yi kar yew jiok chou

Which meant, he killed someone and needed cash to travel to somewhere to lay low.
Well. He needed cash from us but he wasn't going to ask from us nor snatch it.

Try and guess how he wanted the money.
Yes, by now you should know.
He...
is...
a...
robber...

Bingo!!
I was robbed!
I meant the three of us were robbed.

Where you might ask?
Well, we were robbed at home ....
Duh...
Somewhere in public

It was at Mc Donald near Mydin at the 2nd floor.
The feeling was Su Goi!!

You think so too?
Just pulling your leg(s).

It was horrible.
We were baffled.
I wanted to fight him but ....
same story from almost everyone; What if he has AIDs? or He has a knife/weapon?

Fine, sat there helplessly as three teenagers got blackmailed.
He asked us how much we got?
I lied with RM2-3 while Vince and Jun Bin said RM10.

He took their money and left.
Note this, he said he will return the money.

Lol.When pigs fly perhaps.

We left that Mc Donald and went to a nearby Mc Donald.
Guess who we met again as the cashier there.
+_=

We

saw

...

a plain cashier standing there asking us for our order.
Lol. This is just a joke.

We sat there real scared in case we might bump into him again or in this case him bumping into us. We ate and decided to leave that place quickly to find Vivian because Vince needed to see her to get something back.

Thank God Soh Fook didn't follow us.
We kept making fun of his name. Lol.
Then, anytime some taxi or car pass by we kept joking about the driver being Soh Fook coming back to return our money.

Yeah, fat hopes.

I mean what is wrong with society nowadays.
By the way, you should read what our parents said to us.

Jun Bin's Dad: LOL!!! LOL!!! LOL!!!
-my reaction after hearing the reply was -_-0

Vince
-No comment

Finally, I saved the best for the last.
My Mum: You bunch of cowards! Can't even take down one man? Pathetic!

That was my version. Lol

The real one is this one.
"You should have screamed!"
"Noob kia!"
"Throw something at him!"
"Quickly run!"

-reply for no.1, He might pull a weapon out.
-reply for no.2, I would laugh myself to dead if she said that.
-reply for no.3, same like no.1
-reply for no.4, he had an accomplice waiting at the stairs or downstairs.

But if you were in our shoes, what would you have done?

Choice A
Surrender
-coward but smart-

Choice B
Fight Back
-brave but stupid-

Choice C
Scream
-coward and stupid-

Choice D
Run
-coward,smart but no loyalty to friends-

Choice E
Talk Some Sense Into Him
-stupidest move;he planned to rob you, do you think he has any moral value left?-

Choice F
Deny Having Money
-better than choice E but not good because your giving him the chance to search you-

Lol.I chose choice A and E.
Although I almost picked choice B.

We didn't really thought of choice D.
Lol.

So there you have it the story of how three teenagers got robbed blackmailed by one guy who may actually be blowing water.

Come to think of it, we were pathetic but smart.

Signing off.
Oh yeah, we even joked about this.
Picture this.
We meeting Soh Fook there in Mc Donald again.
And our response will be like this,"You again!!!"

If happens again
"Oh, How are you?"

Finnally
"Sit down,Let me buy you a drink."

Lol, right?

Well really signing off now.
AngelofSorrow

What would you do if he appears at your wedding?

I copied from my friend
Thanks.

Purpose of Life? I need To Know

Bored
Aimless
Pointless
Disorientated
Unsure

All these were/are words that pop-up into my mind.
Firstly, apologizing to Vin Tsen
"Dude, I ran out of credit as well."

Back to topic.
Purpose of Life.

Question 1
"Why am I here?"

Choice A
Your parents were the reason you are here.
-True right?

Choice B
To glorify God in which we are made in the image of him where we exist to honour him and follow his way and do things which are pleasant in his eyes.
-True also. But from a Christian's point of view.

Choice C
I don't know. Your There because your there. (La)!
-If your not sure then this should be your answer.

Choice D
Karma; your reincarnated.
-For other religions who believe in this.

Well my answer would be a combination of A,B and C.
But why am I here?
This question isn't solved yet.

I go to a good school; MBS Monkey Boys' School
I mean Mehthodist Boys' School.

I got things like clothes, handphone, accessories, and computer with a laptop.

Yet, I'm not that happy with my life.
Things just don't feel right.

I wanted to go to W.H.C. today.
But my mum stopped me from going out.

Finally told her that I wanted to meet David in Parkson.
She drove me there.

Car--->Parkson

Me---->Parkson

Me-------->Cab ; from Parkson

Cab------->WHC

Pathetic right?
Just want to go out only but I have to resort to this.
If your thinking that I'm pathetic; try being in my shoes?

And we will see who has the last laugh!

I came up with this on my way there.

Disorientated+Emo = Steven

Disorientated+Emo+Bored = Steven Boo

Disorientated+Emo+Bored+Misery = Steven Boo Chuwen

Steven Boo Chuwen = Me

Conclusion,
I = Disorientated+Emo+Bored+Misery

Simplify it,
I = Disorientated+Emo+Misery+Bored
Almost spelled D.U.M.B.
except for the 'E' Lol.

Claps x3
Followed by Standing Ovation.
And finally words of relieve,
"That Idiot (ME) realised he's Dumb or in this case Demb.

Yeah.
Continuing back the story.
I went there to see my friends.

But,
I reached there and sat beside her.
We chatted for like 1 hour ++.
It was awspiring. ps; refer 1st post about WHC to find out what's awspiring.

Then, I blundered.
-Blundered is a term where you describe the situation where you made an error in your interpretation or strategy. Commonly used in Chess games.

Lol.
Ps. I'm not a walking dictionary nor did I memorised a dictionary.
I made her teared her eyes.

At that point, if she were to cry, God knows what I will do.
She teared her eyes and I felt like crying to.
Seeing her so sad brings me back sad memories of the past.

By the way, it turned out better I think so I will end this story here.

Another thing that caught my mind is Regret.
The word Regret is a very powerful word which affects everyone's life.

Regret.
A feeling of grief over an action,speech or anything;whether the effect is onto self or others.

-_-0

Regret and emo come's in a pair.
Did you notice that?

Well, I did!!
It was in the past where my mum would scold me and stuff, or even give me the cold shoulder treatment where I would regret my actions or speech.

While regretting, I tend to be emo without realising it.
Conclusion; Emo accompanies regret.

But why am I such an emo person?
Well,

According to Psychological analysis.
A person becomes Emo because of biotic factors in his surrounding which includes childhood experiences, life style and values instilled in him.

According to Philosophers' quote,
A person becomes sad when he or she allows himself or herself to be that way.

But what if I am emo because it is me?
That I was borned EMO?
Lol.

Note the title of my blog.
Misery Follow's Me.

Won't it be cool?
You heard about the Angel of Death?

Well, I am the Angel of Grief.
"Su Goi!!!"

Lol

By the way, my problems accumulate because I let them.
I don't want to let go of the past.
Why?
I don't want to forget things that occurred in the past.

I have never opened up so frankly with anyone, not even my mother until today.
"Arigato."

for letting me lose some of my emo'ness.
By the way, my blog isn't that good.
You should read blogs from innit.nuffnang.com.my.
Those blogs there are cool.

But if you do read those blogs there,
Do visit mine to show your support?
Without friends, I am nothing but a trapped canary in a cage.

With all of you, I can spread my wings and fly away into freedom.
Fly!!!

Lol

Well, that's all for now.
Good luck to those taking SPM trial.
And May God Bless those who had their exams.

And to Evelyn, may God bless you on your Add Maths.
Seriously don't want to see you Emo about that.
Moreover, Emo is my thing and you can't have it.

Live Life With No Regrets.
AngelofGrief ;(

Disorientated

It was supposed to be a beautiful day but it turned out wrong.
Just like the saying goes, do not count your chicks until they hatched.
Don't be to sure of something until it is firmly gained or grasped.

I woke up earlier on Sunday.
Surprisingly I did not feel sluggish but I felt energized and dashed to the bathroom to clean up.
Then, the hard part.
Choosing what to wear.
Ps. My wardrobe was like a jungle of clothes and it was quite hard to find the nice ones which was among the normal clothes.

Pissed off that I could not locate the clothes that I wanted I went to my second "wardrobe" and took a set of clothes from there and put them on.

Then, it was time for me to pack my bag.
Placed the most important book inside with Physics and stationeries.
Ran down the stairs and saw my mum sitting there.

I told her I was leaving but she said NO yes but drink a glass of milk first.
I was like -_-0
Fine, I took the carton and pour milk into my mouth until I feel as though i drank one cup.
Ps. I didn't touch the top with my lips nor mouth.

She didn't realise; for if she did, I would get another lecture from her.
But why not?
Just don't touch it and don't spill.
You save on water to wash the glass that you were supposed to use. LOl; Joke.

Was going out till I realised, "where's my handphone?"
I ran up to get it.
Went down again to go out.
Then, "crap" I forgot my wallet.
Ran up to look for it.
Find - Find - Find
Can't find.

Mum'"Can't find then no need to go!" -_-0

Finally found it.
In my bag, in a zipped compartment. -_-00
Ok, time to go.

Wait I forgot something again.
-_-000
Oops, realised i had my watch on my wrist already.

For the ... time, I'm leaving and decided,to go now.
House ---> Bus Stop;09.15 am already.

I was +_-
No difference from last week.
Later actually.
So I thought about it carefully.

Choice A
Take bus
Bus Stop ---> Bus Station
20 mins

Interchange
Bus Station ---> Sunway Pyramid
30 mins

Walk
Sunway Pyramid ---> W.H.C.
10 mins

Others ; Traffic jam and passengers
20 mins

Total time: 1 hour and 20 mins

9.15+ 1 hour and 20 mins = 10.35 ++ am
(LATE)

Choice B
Taxi
Sure reach on time 100%

Conclusion
Choice B was taken due to lack of time.

Reach there early.
Felt left out.
Read newspaper and realised MU vs Birmingham.
Btw. MU won 1-0
But Liverpool lose to Totenham. Superfragelisticexpealledocius,which also means Wow
PS; spelling might be wrong.

But Liverpool lose, the fact that they lose their first game.

Back to the main point.
I went through Main service.
Today Pastor Isac was there.
Wonderful speech.

I sat infront because I was early.
Then. realised, Evelyn and Emmely were sitting behind.
Should I reserve sits for you infront next time?

Then, lunch.
As expected, budgetting was my main issue here.
But fatigue was getting on me.
Bought 3 cups of coffee to actually get rid of sleepiness.
But Ben's grandmom came and gave me a meal again.

My heart ache to see such kindness showered upon me.
Please don't be too nice because the more I grow attached to something, the harder the dissapointment is.
That's why I don't really socialise all out unless there's a gurantee we can meet continuously.

Then, I told her that I felt that it wasn't right to take things for granted.
She said it's ok and said it was a blessing from God.
I wanted to cry there and then but I restrained myself from doing so.

Then, it rained.
I felt like going back before it became too heavy.
Justin offered to send me home and send me to W.H.C. on Sunday.
I was >.<
your too nice man.
But i don't want to trouble any one.

It may have been your way to help people
But it's my fault actually; my family's way of life
There's no free lunch in this world.

And this was my way of life
until you all proved me wrong.

My principle of life was wrong.
Such kindness do exist in this world.

Then, Evelyn said she can't stay for Youth.
Which she contradicted herself later. Lol.

I, then left.
It rained when I was half way there and I got drenched.
Yeah, that's punishment? For being rude?
I will take it for my misconduct and behaviour.

Took a cab and wondered.
What is this feeling that is inside me?
I prayed for an answer.

When I was there dazing off, it struck me that this feeling is real.
But, who am I kidding.
NO way it would happen.
Pessimistic attitude.

Realised this today. (MONDAY)
Was listening to "When I'm Gone" by Simple Plan.
Then this phrase caught my attention.
"Misery Needs Company, so So... Long when I'm Gone..."
Yes,I agree to that.

Misery needs company and that's me.
And So Long to all of you if I don't see you all next week and for some time.
Emo...

Then Eric spoke to me about Family, Associates and Kindness.
He made me realised this.

People who are kind are rare.
People who help you are good.
People help you when things are good.
But will people help you when they are facing problems themselves?

I said,"Yes"
He said,"Don't be naive"
Me -_-0

I constantly disobey my parents' by going there.
He asked,"Which is more important family or God?"
I was perplexed by that Question.
Couldn't answer.

HE asked me this,"You enjoy yourself with people from W.H.C. right?But if you were to choose between them and your family?

I replied,"We are one big family there.

His reply,"Blood is thicker then water for family but those people have no blood relation to you.

What can I do?
Disobey my family members? or Stop going to W.H.C?
We must honour our parents and God! as said by God.
But if you must choose between one side?

FollowedbyMisery
Good bye.

Second Happy Sunday XD

Guess where I went today?
That's right I went back to the same place like last week.
Only this time I knew the way there although I was late.
Ps. (The bus was slow and there was a slight traffic jam on the way)

Went in late but like they said, Better late then never.
Saw Evelyn and Emmely singing on stage. It was so cool of them to be able to go up and sing.

Regardless whether back up or main singer, we still love Him which is a common similarity among us. The second time there today I sat right at the back because I went in there late.

Well, late comers can't be picky.
Note to self, be there early next time.
The main service today was really interesting as I managed to focus on it despite being worn out from an all nighter reading manga and blogs dota a bit.

I really love to hear words of God correct me if I am wrong; using this sentence. I find it real interesting and awspiring (awe+inspiring).
It ended soon and time for lunch.

Well, I was budgeting so I decided to skip lunch.
Emmely asked me whether I had my meal; I disclosed to her that I haven't even take my breakfast. Lol.

Well, everyone was awsomely nice to me.
Justin wanted to share with me his meal. Thanks for the offer.
Mr Chan wanted to buy me lunch. Thanks Uncle but I feel uneasy taking meal like that.
Finally our MVP, Benjamin correct me if I mistook him for someone else; bought me a meal without me asking and treated me with warmth and kindness.
Thanks a million to those names I mentioned above.

I would love to return the favour one day.
Before my meal, I saw the Benjamin, Evelyn and several more; sorry weak with names,
making a comercial video. That was so hilarious yet so cool because they were so independent.

Then, Benjamin pulled me out for my meal. Thanks again.
After eating, I saw the girls practicing their dance moves.
Cool, I'm sure you all will be great although I'm not sure whether or not I will be able to attend the Family Day celebration.
Ps. I have a family but my trial exam is on the next day.

But I will say this, I will not miss any events organized by W.H.C. for the world.
I finally bought "it".
I'm not typing what "it" is to refrain from angering my parents.
You all know why.

Then Justin came with this cool software and installed it in my phone.
I love it.
It's terrific and I really could benefit from it when I can't bring "it" on trips with family members.

Then, we went in to the hall and played several mind boggling games.
They were easy in the beginning but soon gave me a headache when it started to get harder.
Besides, I was too sleepy to concentrate.
I had 2 cup of coffees which still wasn't sufficient to keep me awake.

Lol
Funny thing was I almost and did slept while Youth service was singing.
I slept while standing. O.0
I'm not weird; tell me I am not weird right? >.<

Well, I had the great opportunity to feast my eyes upon the artwork of Evelyn's hand drawn art which were totally awesome and awespiring.
She clearly has the talent and passion just like me for cooking.
Ps. No shame in being unable to cook; why my own sister in her 20s can't even cook so there's nothing to be ashamed off.

Pursue your dreams as a Manga Artist or an animator for there will be "HIM" to support you as you pursue your dreams with no regrets nor worries. >.<
There will be the rest of us to support you as well.

By the way, just saying my opinion alright? NO offence.
Blogging don't really need extreme maturity level.
Any one can blog but it depends on the person whether he or she wants to blog in a good manner or vice versa.

If you have a younger sibling who wants to blog, you should encourage them because blogging is good as it improves our vocab If and only If you use proper English and it enables you to express yourself.

So blogging isn't all bad you see; it's more good then bad.
If you worry you don't know what to type, well any thing can be taken as a topic.
Things like books, mangas, or things you adore.
Blogging is a limitless zone as long as you play by the rules.

So don't think negative towards blogging and have some confidence in yourself. Why do you worry whether you can keep your blog going or not when we shouldn't worry for "HE" did not give us fear but... ;you know the rest of the story right?

And do not refrain younger siblings from blogging.
It's not right because you are doing it; why not them?
If you fear too much then guide them to ensure they play by he rules to enable them to be independent in the future where they can soar with their wings.

Lol.
I sound like a philosopher.
Do I?

And one last thing, my chat box is pathetically empty.
Well, that's because I changed my template and deleted my old chat box.
If you readers do not mind, kindly leave some comments or words in my chat box.
Please and thank you.

May God bless you all.
In Jesus name,
Amen.

Thanks a million to everyone for brightening my day.

Signing off
CheeredUpSoul.
Giving up the name UberBadBoy
See ya.

Happy Sunday

Wonderful Sunday.
I went to World Harvest Church today.
It took me a whole hour to find it but i finally found it with Emmely and her dad's help.
Thanks a lot.

Felt nervous at first.
But they calmed me down.
Thanks a lot to Mr and Mrs Isac for being ever so nice.
Thanks a lot to the rest of the Youth Service there which includes Evelyn, Emmely, Fabian, Ian, Marcus, Benjamin and a whole lot more if I could remember your names.
Don't blame me I'm bad with remembering names, give me time and I will do my best.

I felt that going to the W.H.C. was awspiring (awness+inspiring).
If I get to go there again I will not miss it for the world.
Just like the what I learned from the Services, no one can take Christ from me and no one can stop me from going to worship the Lord.

But for now I'm obliged to follow my parents' wish by; you know.
Felt a bit nostalgic leaving that wonderful place; filled with family warmth even though I've been there once only but we felt as though we've met for a long period of time.

Evelyn changed for the better to as I met her today.
She's ever so friendly and cute (kawaii). Give yourself more confidence please!!
Ignore insults and teases as they do not how to appreciate you; their lose.

Emmely was as usual; the bears are rental, can I have them back next week;if I can go. Seriously XD

I met many new friends all so ever loving and kind.
Thanks a million.
And last but not least Mr Chan who was so kind to guide me there and even dropped me off at Sunway Pyramid. I owe you one, sir.

There was this guy next to Benjamin, Indian quite tall and thin.
I gave him my number but he didn't miss call me back.
He was every so friendly.
He and Ian came for me when I was avoiding them.
Thanks a lot.

I shouldn't have avoided Christ but go to him and seek refuge in him when troubled.
I owe you guys one for preventing me from further sinning.
I would dearly pay anything to meet you guys again.

By the way, Marcus is a good friend there. He's a 2418 year old man teenager who is cool and can easily chill with anyone; I mean it.
Don't let his fierce expression fool you.
Beneath that fierce look is a gentle teenager*.
Here's to Marcus; 18 forever.

To Ian,
Thanks a million dude for chilling with me.
I treasure our friendship and hope to see you.
If it wasn't for you I might have already went back early.

Pastor Isac and Wife,
I enjoyed both the services that both of you gave.
It was terrific; I usually get bored in talks but both of you were terrific.
Both of you were ever so kind to pray for me and get to know me.
I feel that it was an honour meeting both of you.
Thanks a million.

And to the rest, I thank you all from the bottom of my Broken Heart.
If God willing, I will definitely visit all of you as I have said; I won't miss World Harvest Church's Services for the world.

Hope to see all of you next week.
May God bless you.
In Jesus name, Amen.

Thanks a million to everyone.

Live Life With No Regrets.
UberBadBoy

I'm Fighting Back Now.

"You see this tag. It bloody gives me the power to make the decision without your bloody agreement".

"Espirit de Corpse go where already? Or were you too hungry that you ate it without realizing it?"

I know I have not been the perfect member. I tried my best which still isn't good enough. So, not everyone is perfect like you. I'm not that enthusiastic to burn my time in that place you called your second home.

It is tradition. But you stood there doing bloody nothing and decided to give them more by imposing this new "understanding" which we lost like I don't know 200% ?

What had been tradition was burned to ashes in mere hours 1-2 hours.You did not even bother to stand for our rights but acknowledged defeat just like a that.

May I ask,"Are you one of "them" from the beginning trying to consume us from inside out?
I dare say you did a darn fine job.
You said majority of the upper class members agreed.
Try telling the lower class members in a group and see where the majority stands?

You say it will be neat and tidy if we follow the new "agreement"?
Face facts you dim-witted guy.
We can't even wear nicely with buttons unbutton, ***s lowered instead of pulled properly or different styles of tying ***s. What tidiness can you hope to accomplish? And that was before retirement, what about now?
After retirement?

They set a simple condition.
Which was 2 days.
You did not fight back but gave them 5 days instead. How generous are you?
We asked for small stuffs like reduce in work or stuff but you said "No".
He wanted to change our lifestyle or tradition which existed for years and you said "Yes" and supported their idea and gave more?!

You may have the power. Correction you once had the power.
You are retired. On the 27th of July 2009, your power should have been given to your successor.

NOooooo. You can't seem to let go for reasons I do not know why.
You can play it your way but I will fight back my way.
I have come too far to be let down like this.

Live Life With NO Regrets.

By the way, Keep My Bloody Certificate If You Want.
See If I bloody Care!!!

UberVengefulBoys

...

I stood there every bloody wonderful day there waiting for you.
The least you could do was to say "Hi" back to me.
But we were to oblivious to each others' presence.
I gazed upon you with such sorrow in my heart as I knew that soon this would be nothing but a horrible nostalgic incident which i will reminisce.
The more I tried the more it backfired upon me.

I am feeling very tensed up.
Time is crawling racing past me and I try to drag it to lengthen the time we have together.
Nevertheless, you didn't want to be part of it and I was left alone trying my best to salvage the remnants of whatever broken bits that was left behind.
If only you would notice that wherever "A" was, "B" was nearby.
Maybe you wouldn't have noticed it because I do not wish to draw attention to either me or you.
But I think you should have felt it, my intense stare gaze as I stood there like a gentleman FOOL waiting for the so called moment.

Who am I kidding?!
Your destined to be alone and lonely forever for a short duration of time.
But why can't I feel peaceful?
I feel so tensed up that I feel that I will can murder anyone annoying me.
But the mere thought of you calms me down.

Live Life With No Regrets.
Signing oFF

UberSotJor UberBadBoy

Conjuring of Kensett Blazing Chop Elixir of Blazing Fowl

In a faraway kingdom, there were two young blood elfs who went to a conjuring showdowm at Roltay Legcol, in Lingep Ajay. They went there "prepared" to do their best to conjure up Kensett Blazing Chop Elixir of Blazing Fowl. Many were there including the dreaded ShowOFF of their Conjuring Legion, with banners and armors of Conjuring.

There, we were given the weirdest of ingredients. Well. The ingredients were rare and not common. We enhanced ourselves with confidence and a pinch of humor. We even talked about Maidens "shorties" to boost our morale. We started off as soon as possible. My comrade's duty was to secure the legendary "Fowl" and to harness it's greatness to our benefit while my duty was to gather other materials before we conjure the Elixir of Blazing Fowl.

Time flew by till the Sun and Moon took 5 and even had to have shifts to keep up with us as we battled with our lifes on the line. Those nosy "Old Fart for A Pathetic Excuse" kept swarming in at us and taking every opportunity to ensnare us.
Nevertheless, we were aware of their bloody pressence and fended them off by smiling at them like a kiss ass good student with a blade behind us wanting to stab them. Well, mostly me.

When the conjuring was done, we were exhausted as we spent most of our life force in it. From the start, it seems we've put everything we've got into the conjuring of The Elixir of Blazing Fowl, but we were planning to lose the Conjuring Showdown for he had a enhancement course to attend while I had a ball to attend invited by a "HER(o)".

We've lost and soon fled for our lifes as we did not want to be tortured by their insane method of torture "Briefing" where those "Kiss Asses" who looked up to the "Old Fart for A Pathetic Excuse" as God will use the dreaded move called "Lecture" which caused masssive destruction on the Universe creating A**Holes BlackHoles. I wanted to shoot at them for claiming the "Old Fart for A Pathetic Excuse" to be God. But I hadn't had enough time to do it. Note, that their treachery will not be left alone like that. I shall destroy them for incurring my wrath and fury. "Die Insolent "Kiss Asses".

Soon, we left that accursed place and I went to the Land of B(reezy) B(attle) S(un) P(ort) for the ball. The HER(o) was there but was busy. I felt like a fool and tried to ignore the insult but it was too much. I scouted the perimeter several times and mingled with the townsfolk to gather information about their defenses and offenses to set a strategy to devour the land. Soon, my secondary mission was done and I've decided to leave the place after I was exhausted.

I traveled on foot to another distanced land called P(ark)sun in Overseas United Grave Garden to meet with my fellow comrade Lt Dav of Yarl Defense
and Research Industry. There, we competed with our skills and I was defeated but at least I enjoyed myself compared to the ball. This means there are no comrades better then those you hung out often with. Thus, I went back to my Fort and that's the end of my mega-uber-borring-day-which-I-never-to-undergo-in-my-life adventurous expedition.

Note that this is just a story.
To those who understand it, Kudos.
To to those who don't, plea to me and you might be enlightened.

Live Life With No Regrets
UberSotJor

signing off.

RULES: 1. Put your iTunes, Windows Media Player, etc. on shuffle
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS
4. Tag 10 friends
5. Everyone tagged has to do the same thing
6. Have Fun! =.=

IF SOMEONE SAYS 'ARE YOU OKAY' YOU SAY:
Ting Ma MA de Hua
HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOURSELF?
Take My Hand >.<
WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
My life would suck without you.
HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
Love Story (Wow)
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
Everytime We Touch (WTF)
WHAT'S YOUR MOTTO?
Taking Back My Love (lol)
WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
As Long As You Love ME (OMG)
WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
Hot N' Cold (WOOOO)
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
Raise Me Up
WHAT IS 2 + 2?
Xin Diao ( lol )
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
Tui Hou < what does it mean? >
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
A Little Too Not Over You
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
Sk8ter Boy
WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Ni He Wo(Lee Hom) XD
WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
Poker Face
WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Wait For You (Wow, I die d wor)
WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST??
Fire Burning On The Dance Floor
WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR??
The Great Escape < I not sure i can escape a not >
WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
Swing Swing
WHAT DO YOU WANT RIGHT NOW?
Ai Ni so ngam man
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
Hate That I love You * applied to boys
WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
I'd Do Anything

Wakakaka For fun only so i might not tagg any one but all that read it.
UberSotJor
Live Life With No Regrets.

I Tagged MySelf. 1st time .

I have. . . (a point for each one)

1. smoked.
2. consumed alcohol.
3. slept in the same bed with someone of the opposite sex.
4. slept in the same bed with someone of the same sex.
5. kissed someone of the same sex.
6. had sex.
7. had someone in your room other than family.
8. watched porn.
9. bought porn.
10. tried drugs.
#MY TOTAL: 7

1. taken painkillers.
2. taken someone else's prescription medicine.
3. lied to your parents.
4. lied to a friend.
5. snuck out of the house.
6. done something illegal.
7. felt hurt.
8. hurt someone.
9. wished someone to die.
10. seen someone die.
#MY TOTAL: 7

1. missed curfew.
2. stayed out all night.
3. eaten a carton of ice cream by yourself.
4. been to a therapist.
5. received a ticket.
6. been to rehab
7. dyed your hair.
8. been in an accident.
9. been to a club.
10. been to a bar
#MY TOTAL: 6

1. been to a wild party.
2. been to a Mardi Gras parade.
3. drank more than three alcoholic beverages in a night.
4. had a spring break in Florida.
5. sniffed anything
6. wore black nail polish
7. wore arm bands.
8. wore t-shirts with band names.
9. listened to rap.
10. owned a 50 Cent CD.
#MY TOTAL: 5

1. dressed gothic
2. dressed girly.
3. dressed punk.
4. dressed grunge.
5. stole something.
6. been too drunk to remember anything.
7. blacked out.
8. fainted.
9. had a crush on a neighbor.
#MY TOTAL: 5

1. had a crush on a friend.
2. been to a concert.
3. dry-humped someone.
4. been called a slut.
5. called someone a slut.
6. installed speakers in your car.
7. broken a mirror.
8. showered at someone of the opposites sex's house
9. brushed your teeth with someone else's toothbrush.
#MY TOTAL: 5

1. consider/considered Ludacris your favorite rapper.
2. seen an R-rated movie in theater.
3. cruised the mall.
4. skipped school.
5. had surgery.
6. had an injury.
7. gone to court.
8. walked out of a restaurant without paying/tipping.
9. caught something on fire.
10. lied about your age.
#MY TOTAL: 7

1. owned/rented an apartment/house.
2. broke the law in the police's presence.
3. made out with someone who had a gf/bf
4. got in trouble with the police.
5. talked to a stranger.
6. hugged a stranger.
7. kissed a stranger.
8. rode in the car with a stranger.
9. been harassed.
10.been verbally harassed.
#MY TOTAL: 5

1. met face-to-face with someone you met online.
2. stayed online for 5+ hours straight.
3. talked on the phone for more than 4 hours straight.
4. watched TV for 5 hours straight.
5. been to a fair.
6. been called a bad influence.
7. drink and drive.
8. prank-called someone.
9. laid on a couch with someone of the opposite sex.
10. cheated on a test.
#MY TOTAL: 8

Grand Total: 55

If You Have Less Than 10.. write [im a Goody Goody]
If You Have More Than 10.. write [im still a goody goody]
If You Have more Than 20..write [im average]
If You Have More Than 30..write [im a bad kid]
If You have more than 40..write [im a very bad influence]
If You Have more than 50..write [im a horrible person]
If You Have more than 60..write [i should be in jail]
If You Have more than 70..Write [i should be dead]


Hereby
I proudly declare that,

I m a horrible person.
Thus, UberBadBoy

Salutation Boy. I respect him!!!

A beautiful teacher was having trouble with one of her students in 1st Grade class. She asked,"Boy. What is your problem?" Boy answered, "I'm too smart for the first-grade. My sister is in the third-grade And I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the 4th Grade!"



Madam had enough. She took the boy to the Principal's office. While the boy waited in the outer office, Madam explained to the principal what the situation was. The principal told Madam he would give the boy a test. And If he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the first-grade And Behave. She agreed. The boy was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test.

Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"
Boy.: "9".


Principal: "What is 6 x 6?"
Boy.: "36".

And so it went with every question the principal thought a 4th grade should know. The principal looks at Madam and tells her, "I think this Boy can go to the 4th grade." Madam says to the principal, "I have some of my own questions. Can I ask him?" The principal and the boy both agreed.


Madam asks, "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of"?
Boy, after a moment,

* "Legs."*



Madam: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?"
Boy.:

* "Pockets." *




Madam: What starts with a C and ends with a T, Is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin whitish liquid?
Boy.:

* Coconut ; *




Madam: What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?
The Principal's eyes open really wide And Before he could stop the answer, The boy was taking charge.
Boy.:

* Bubble-gum. *




Madam: What does a man do standing up, A woman does sitting down And A dog does on three legs?
The Principal's eyes open really wide And Before, he could stop the answer...
Boy.:

* Shake hands. *



Madam: A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you're bored. The best man always has me first.
Boy.:

* Wedding Ring. *



Madam: I come in many sizes. When I'm not well, I drip. When you blow me, You feel good.
Boy.:

* Nose.*




Madam: I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates. I come with a quiver..
Boy.:

* Arrow. *




Madam: What word starts with a 'F' and ends in 'K' That means lot of heat and excitement?
Boy.:

* Fire-truck. *




Madam: What four-letter word that starts with a 'F' and ends in 'K' & If you don't get it, You have to use your hand.
Boy.:

* Fork. *




Madam: What is it that all men have one of, it's longer on some men than on others, The Pope doesn't use his, And A man gives it to his wife after they're married?
Boy.:

* SURNAME. *



Madam: What part of the man has no bone But has muscles, Has lots of veins, Like pumping, & Is responsible for making love ?
Boy.:

* HEART. *



The principal breathed a sigh of relief And Said to the teacher, "Send this Boy to grade 5, "I got the last ten questions wrong myself!"

Taken from my friend.
Live Life With No Regrets
UberSotJor

White Flag

I give up.

I m losing my focus. In BM tuition my mind sorta blanked out for several moments.
How could i commit such silly mistakes?

I m a "tensai"
Addicted to manga now ; Slam Dunk


I go to school like every other student but the only difference between me and them is all I see is "her" and all I hear is "her" as well.

Can you imagine that I am able to regconize her voice although some one who knew her longer than me failed?

Is this love, lust or admiration?
Darn it, why did I listened to the "No Apologies" talk?

Frankly speaking some of you guys, might know what happened?

Punk went to see Tan Sri while he was there Yang Berhormat came in.
Punk was obviuosly shocked because how could Yang Berhormat come in so sudddenly?

It was never expected .
Wednesday was a lucky day because i didn't have to go for that class.
But Tuesday wasn't that good because I had to work hard.
Thank god the lady boss understood Punk and let him rest.

Punk (-_-)

saw

her


Punk (-_-) --------> Punk (-"-) ----> Punk (^_^)

But I don't know anything.
I m clueless and speechless when I do stuffs nowadays.

And to top it off I have this Cullinary Showdown on the 18th.
Sorry UberInnocentGirl, I can't make it that day although I wanted to.

Well that's all for now.
I need rest because in a few hours after sunrise I will be practicing at Vin Tsen's house.
Hope his parent and family will not mind my presence on a Sunday but it can't be helped.

Night night, wish me luck that i do not burn Vin Tsen's house down nor cause all of us food poisoning tomorow.

Life live with no regrets
UberSotJor

?depyt I tahw dear ouy naC

.emit gnol yrev a rof tsop t'nevah I
.deciton ydobyrevE
?glob ym sdear ohw, taiW

!lfesym egnellahc ot siht ekil epyt ot dediced I os,derob ma I dna od ot gnihton evah I
!gnol oot gnikaerf yadilloh fo skeew owT? od ot em tcepxe uoy od tahW

!glob a ni siht ekil gnihtemos dear uoy emit tsrif eht si siht teb I
?hsirebbig saw it thguoht uoy did, ecnalg tsrif eht tA
!did uoy teb I

!ti hguorht ees ot hguone trams era uoy fo emos ebyaM
!tsenoh eB

!derob ro tneitap rehtie era uoy snaem ti, raf siht dear ot deganam uoy fI
.ffuts driew gniod ekil uoy rO
<.>

!ereh llit etirw ot ruoh na flah em koot tI
?"sith ekil gnipyt emit sih etsaw eh dluow yhW"niotseuq siht ksa thgim lla uoY
.dreob ma I,elpmis si rewsna ehT
!derob rebU

!yoB yzarC rebU otni yoB daB rebU morf gninrut eb thgim I kniht I
!atoD ot ffo ma I,won og ot tog I lleW
.niaga epyt ot ediced I nehw emit txen eht lliT

!won rof atat oS

anosreP derob rebU
!sterger on htiw efil eviL

Mimpi Ngeri

Kian lama saya telah menghadapi ketidaktenangan ketika tidur selama beberapa malam yang berterusan. Saya sering dihantui oleh mimpi ngeri yang hampir sama. Walaupun tiap-tiap kali wataknya berbeza, namun demikian, plotnya sama.

Setiap mimpi ngeri pun sama. Kesudahannya ialah saya secara tidak sengaja membunuh rakan baik saya dan menyesali perbuatan saya. Apakah maksud mimpi ini?

Adakah pada suatu masa nanti saya akan membunuh seseorang pada masa depan?
Mari kita berfikir tentang pembuatan senjata.

Senjata diperkenalkan sejak daripada zaman Neolitik lagi iaitu zaman pra sejarah.
Senjata terawal diperbuat daripada batu dan kuasanya tidak begitu hebat berbanding dengan senjata terhebat iaitu senjata nuklear yang mampu melenyapkan sebuah negara.

Pencipta ataupun ahli saintis yang berjaya mencipta sesebuah senjata sering diberi ganjaran. Namun demikian, penciptaan senjata hanya mendatangkan kemusnahan. Menurut sejarah, banyak kuasa barat yang bertanding untuk menghasilkan senjata atom pada tahun 1940-an untuk menghadapi perang dunia kedua. Pada ketika itu, negara Amerika Syarikat berjaya menghasilkannya dan kuasanya sungguh menyeramkan apabila bandar Hiroshima dan Nagasaki lenyap. Kedua-dua bandar tersebut yang memakan masa yang begitu panjang untuk dibentuk, keunikan bandar-bandar tersebut dan nyawa-nyawa rakyat yang tidak berdosa hilang dalam sekelip mata.

Ahli saintis, Nobel, pengasas Anugerah Nobel telah membentuk sebuah NGO dengan harapan duitnya dapat digunakan untuk keamanan. Hal ini berpunca daripada bekas tanganya iaitu penciptaan dinamit yang telah meragut nyawa dalam peperangan. Usaha murni beliau untuk menamatkan peperangan sungguh bermakna dan usahanya masih diteruskan sehingga hari ini.

Kembali kepada topik utama, senjata. Adakah masyarakat seantero dunia tidak sedar akan pepatah nasi sudah menjadi bubur? Hal ini demikian kerana apabila pembunuhan telah dilakukan dengan senjata, betapa kuatnya kita menyesal sudah pun tiada berguna. Betapa hebat kita menangis pun sampai darah ditangisi juga sesseorang yang telah kita bunuh sememangnya akan kekal mati. Pada masa itu, kita sudah tentu akan berfikir, " Apakah yang akan berlaku jika saya tidak membunuhnya? Sebaliknya saya cuba berbaik-baik dengannya,"

Berkemungkinan kami boleh berkawan dan hidup secara harmoni. Namun demikian, dunia dipenuhi dengan pelbagai anasir-anasir yang mampu mempengaruhi mida seseorang untuk menyebabkannya membuat keputusan salah lalu membunuh seseorang.

Perlukah senjata dicipta?
Jika tiada senjata dicipta nescaya kita semua dapat hidup secara aman.

Hargailah nyawa insan.

Beribu bintang dilangit
Kini menghilang
Meraba aku dalam kelam
Rembulan mengambang
Kini makin suram
Pudar ilhamku tanpa arah

Sedetik wajahmu muncul
Dalam diam
Ada kerdipan ada sinar
Itukah bintang ataupun rembulan
Terima kasih kuucapkan

Izinkan kumencuri bayangan wajahmu
Izinkan ku mencuri khayalan denganmu
Maafkanlah oh...
Andai lagu ini
Mengganggu ruangan hidupmu
Kau senyumlah oh...
Sekadar memori
Kita di arena ini
Kau ilhamku
Kau ilhamku...

Kesedihan yang telah berpaut pada saya sungguh membebankan. Saya teringing sangat memberitahu dia bahawa saya masih mencintainya tetapi saya tidak berani berbuat demikian kerana janji saya padanya bahawa saya tidak akan menyukainya lagi. Saya tidak ingin memberitahu dia tentang perasaan saya terhadapnya kerana saya takut kami tidak boleh jadi kawan lagi. Oleh itu, saya telah membuat keputusan yang saya tahu saya tidak akan menyesal iaitu saya ingin merosakkan imej saya di hadapnnya agar dia tidak akan mengendahkan saya.

Kepiluan yang dirasai menusuk ke dalam hati saya dan tiada perkara yang boleh menewaskan kesedihan yang terpendam dalam diri saya. Walaupun saya tahu ini akan menyebabkan dia berasa sedih sedikit namun demikian saya terpaksa berbuat demikian untuk kebaikan kami berdua. Tambahan pula, dia ada banyak kawan yang mampu menjaganya dan saya bukan salah seorang daripadanya.

Kalau saya diberi pilihan untuk memilih apa jua benda saya akan memilihnya. Tetapi ini semua hanya impian sahaja.
Dia melayan saya dengan semakin dingin belakangan ini tetapi saya tidak menghargai segalanya kerana saya tidak ingin melupakannya.
Saya tidak mampu tahan dengan kesedihan ini

...... Kau Ilhamku Yang Terpenting

People Of Kuala Lumpur Have No Sympathy

It was anything but a fine Friday when my three good-for-nothing-involved-in-a-relationship friends decided to go dating at the same time. So, i was left alone and decided to go home.
On my way to the bus station, i do not know why but i walked into Mc Donalds for a meal.
I had the same thing, Double Cheese Burger set and mind you it was on promotion so it was cheaper, ok!

I waited for my turn and placed my order.
Well that's not the main point, the story begun when i was about to leave Mc Donald.
I saw this blind guy walking down the stairs and no one offfered to help him.
I was like,"Dam it, can't any of you offer to help him?"

Finally, he reached the ground floor without help.
* I wanted to help him but he was at the bottom of the stairs while i was the top of the stairs

He was walking fine untill he banged the Mc Donald toys display.
The lane was narrow and it was either him knocking into the toy displays or his stick hitting the rubbish bin.

Not that I want to boast but I end up walking up to him and help him through it.
He told me he wanted to go to Masjid Jamek.
Honestly I do not know where Masjid Jamek is, so i asked a few passersby when one managed to tell me.

We walked and walked. He related his unforntunate incident to me while i was leading him to Masjid Jamek. His money got stolen, he has no money to buy a ticket and he desperately needs to get to Masjid Jamek fast.

I was not in a rush, so i told him i will bring him there.
I just can't bear to see him suffering like that.
Can anyone of you tell me who enjoys being blind?

If you do, please donate your eyes to the blind people.
I guided him there.
Then, he wanted to buy ciggaretes from 7-11, so i brought him there.
I made it clear to him that i am a student and i will only look at the purchase to prevent him from being conned.
He said he understand and we went there.

The poor man didnt even have more then RM5 to buy the ciggaretes.
If i had the money i would have spared him a few Ringgit.

Then he told me that he reached his destination and will wait for someone to get him.
He assured me that he will be alright.
In my heart i was wondering why can't people be more sivic-concious?

As our country is becoming even modern, we are losing our humanity.
Is it that hard to help someone a fellow human who is less fortunate?

Ponder About it and see whether you agree a not.

Kembali dari zaman kegelapan

Setelah lama saya menulis laman sesawang saya, saya bercadang untuk menulis semula dalam laman sesawang saya. Banyak perkara telah berlaku dalam hidup saya semenjak kejadian itu.
Pada mulanya saya tidak bercadang untuk meminati ****** namundemikian, bak kata pepatah Melayu tak kenal maka tak cinta.

Setelah saya mengambil peluang untuk mengenali ****** saya merasai bahawa hidup saya tidak lagi dikelami kesedihan. Masa kami bersama, saya berpeluang merasai kegembiraan yang tidak terhingga.Walaupun masa kami berdua bersama pendek, namundemikian kegembiraan yang dirasai tidak pernah saya rasai ataupun perolehi.

Namundemikian, bak kata pepatah melayu terlanjur sampan boleh undur tetapi terlanjur kata tidak boleh simpan, segala-galanya musnah dalam sekelip mata akibat ketidaksenonohan sikap saya. Jikalau saya meluangkan lebih banyak perhatian dan masa kepada ****** sudah pasti kehidupan kami berdua tidak akan begitu merana.

Namun begitu, kehidupannya telah bertukar menjadi lebih baik dan saya berasa gembira untuknya. Pada mulanya saya berpendapat bahawa saya dapat melupakan segala memori yang menyedihkan tetapi itu merupakan suatu kesilapan yang besar. Saya bukan sahaja gagal melupakannya malah perasaan saya terhadapnya semakin berkobar-kobar. Saya sentiasa dirabai oleh kesedihan walaupun dalam apa keadaan jua.

Apatah lagi yang harus saya lalui lagi sebelum saya dapat merasai kebahagiaan?
Saya tidak inginkan segala kekayaan atau kuasa yang terdapat dalam dunia ini, saya hanya mempunyai satu hasrat sahaja iaitu dapat bersama dengannya. Namun demikian, keadaan tersebut kelihatan janggal dan saya berasa seolah-olah saya sedang menipu diri sendiri.

Segala-galanya tidak sama seperti dahulu. Jika ruangan masa dapat diundurkan saya akan membuat keputusan untuk meminatinya lebih awal agar saya tidak akan kehilangannya.

sesal dahulu pendapatan, sesal kemudian tiada berguna kerana nasi telah menjadi bubur