Of Friendship and Death

It was many years ago, more than a decade when I first knew Max. He was bright and radiated joy to me. He made me happy as a friend as we hung out a lot. We played the whole day and we shared many memories together.

But today, I came home and was told that he passed away. My best friend passed away and I wasn't there to see him off. If only I had knew, I would have rushed to see him one last time, before he breathed his last.

Many years went by and the bond between us are strong and I was reluctant to cry in front of my family members. I wished I can cry out but I don't want to let my family member know that I am unhappy, so I quietly went to my room.

I remember I played pranks on him quite often but he was a forgiving friend. He Never hold grudges against me nor hate me for those seemingly never ending pranks. He remained committed to me as a friend and I often took that for granted.

Little did I know that soon I will regret it for life and today was the day. He went off and I didn't get to see him. Why? He was nice and never hurt a fly, why did he have to go?

But recently, I didn't really spend time with him because of other stuffs in life. We hardly spent time together even though he wanted to. I know he wants to spend time with me but dared not disturb me. I was a total jerk to him taking his kindness for granted.

Great attitude you fool, he's gone and there's nothing you can do about it. I mean I realised I broke lots of promises made to him but he never show anger at me. I mean it he never showed anger but I could see the warmth of friendship from his eyes until I started to isolate myself from him. Day by day, if we met, I saw sorrow growing in his eyes but he tries his best to cover it with a smile.

I am a fool and a jerk. I never expected him to die so suddenly like that. Oh I forgot, he showed his anger once when I went over board and pushed him too far. Well, I was really mean at that time, serves me right.

I remembered I broke his leg a few years back when I was playing with him. He never gained full control of his leg and it hurt him every time it rained. I felt dam guilty and realised that I suck as a friend and he was the definition of an amazing friend.

I really miss him now but people tend to cherish their loved ones when they are gone. If only I had spent more time with him, apologize for the shit I've put him through and fulfilled my promises.

But bottom line is, I didn't and that will haunt me for the rest of my life.
Good bye dear friend, may you rest in peace.

Live Life With No Regrets (Ironic Much)
Signing off.
Till we meet again.